


following the map that leads to you

by saunatonttu



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Summer School Trip, M/M, Summer Romance, it's kuroo, kuroo is the sick meme, some sick memes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-31
Updated: 2015-08-31
Packaged: 2018-04-18 09:40:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 15,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4701260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saunatonttu/pseuds/saunatonttu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was only a school trip. </p><p>So how did Tsukishima Kei, a seemingly stuck-up first-year student from Karasuno, end up meeting and, most importantly, liking someone like Kuroo Tetsurou, a third year from Nekoma?</p><p>Two weeks and hot summer days, and things that happened between.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. but I wonder where were you

**Author's Note:**

> My fic entry for the Haikyuu!! BB 2015! 
> 
> Special thanks for my artist partner-in-crime, Lexy, whose art I will link here once I have the link.  
> Other thanks go to Momo (aka momorona), who has been encouraging me all this time by spritzing me with water bottles (as much as one can do so online) and being generally threatening when I didn't get writing done. I love you. 
> 
> Also a big thanks to Kay, as always! Your presence on Twitter and here make my days worthwhile and I'm kinda dumb so I don't initiate stuff on my own. But eh. Anyways. Thanks for always being a good sport about my writing and your lovely comments.

Kei felt particularly regretful by the third hour of the bus trip after his iPhone had ran out of battery, thus taking away the only distraction Kei had from the ostentatious classmates some might go as far as to call his friends.

Kei wasn’t part of those _some,_ and so he ended up grinding his teeth together while hoping his headphones themselves would block out the extra annoying sound of Kageyama’s crackling voice. But there was only so much reprieve he was allowed before it turned out to be impossible, since Hinata’s voice more than compensated for the blocked Kageyama’s.

Annoying.

Kei should have realized what he was getting into when Yamaguchi, his only friend as far as Kei was concerned (though denial might be playing its part there), had gently coaxed him into signing a paper for the first year students willing to spend _two weeks_ of their summer vacation on a school trip.

Kei should have known better than to give into Yamaguchi’s quietly insistent smile and reassurances of _it’ll be fun, Tsukki!!!_

“Tsukki,” the very same person that sat by his side now nudged him, a soft frown pulling his brows down, “stop making faces; it’s going to be fun.”

 _Fun_. Yeah, Kei really didn’t know if he wanted any part of that; his kind of fun was sitting in his room with headphones on and maybe something sweet in his hands. He was alone, which was the important part in his fun.

Kei honestly couldn’t find it in himself to believe that the trip was going to be fun in any way.

Which was what he said to Yamaguchi. Again. Only to receive the same response: a sheepish smile, hand on the back of Yamaguchi’s head, and words _you’ll never know if you don’t try!_

“Lame,” Kei said as he reluctantly tucked the headphones against his neck instead of his ears, flinching at the assault of voices that came from every side. His ears hurt, possibly from the loudness of his own music rather than his classmates’. Kei glanced around the bus, his thoughts as murderous as fifteen-year-old teen’s could possibly be.

The bus wasn’t as stuffed as he had feared it to be: apparently not so many fifteen- or sixteen-year-olds wanted to spend two weeks of their precious summer vacation with their classmates sweating under the museum ceilings and hotel rooms. Kei could relate, somewhat, though he was looking forward to the museums and the national park visit more than the average student.

As volatile as his immune system was sometimes with all the allergies, Kei was more or less interested in nature and what it had to offer. Mostly, _silence_ if all background noises from birds and other living creatures inhabiting it were excluded.

Okay, there _may_ be a reason Kei was willing to put up with Hinata and Kageyama. (There was less putting up with Yachi and Yamaguchi — the latter because of years-long friendship, the former because of her own special qualities that made her slightly less irritating from the rest.)

“Hey, hey, Tsukishima!” Hinata, who was unfortunately sitting right behind Kei, leaned over, shoving his face between Yamaguchi and Kei’s seats. Kei wanted to pinch his nose just for the indignant reaction he was sure to get. “What’re you gonna do once we get to the hotel?”

“We’re going to the park first,” Kei sighed, hands twitching with the urge to pull headphones over his ears again.

“Yeah, but after that!” Hinata’s eyes sparkled with the enthusiasm of an idiot. Or possibly a sheltered child. Kei couldn’t say which. “I heard there’s a pool at the hotel! Right, Kageyama?”

“Mm,” Kageyama grunted, and Kei saw him pressing the side of his head against the window almost rebelliously, brows forming an omnipresent frown. “There is.”

“Don’t sound so gloomy, Kageyama! It’s a _pool_!”

“I’d rather it be a volleyball net,” Kageyama muttered darkly, which effectively silenced Hinata for once as the realization settled and the atmosphere turned heavy. Kei would have snickered, but Yamaguchi’s side-glance suggested consequences if he were to laugh.

“I’m sure we’ll have a chance to play at a beach!” Hinata was quick to ignore the heavy tension that had fallen as he shoved his head back into the between of the seats Yamaguchi and Kei occupied. “Tsukishima’s going to play too, right? It’s not like you’ll have to be good at it to have fun!”

“You would know, wouldn’t you?” Kei muttered, a sneer tugging at his lips as his fingers twitched at the side of the headphones. Yamaguchi suppressed a snicker, though he tried to look at Kei with disapproval. Yachi, from the front, turned to them, as well.

“Tsukishima-kun, that was… quite mean…” she trailed off when Kei’s unimpressed stare settled on her, her small shoulders quaking a little before her head disappeared from his sight, her whimper audible.

 _This is going to be a disaster,_ Kei thought.

 

* * *

 

Hours later, and Kei’s assessment of the trip seemed to become more and more accurate as minutes trickled by. (Although, as stated, it had only been a few hours since the beginning of the awful bus ride.)

So, Mount Mitake was as beautiful as Kei had anticipated it to be with its thick forests and fresh air that felt good against his skin and in is lungs, like the caress of his mother’s hand when he had still been young and more open to affection. The soil of the hiking trail was soft under his tennis shoes, not particularly meant for climbing and hiking, and the soft coos of birds rang through the air, beating Kei’s heartbeat by far volume-wise.

It would have been nice if it weren’t for the fact that _somehow,_ who knew how, Kei had gotten lost from the rest of his group, led by a third-year student with the name of Sugawara Koushi. Consequently, the person of their group that had had the map of Mount Mitake and the routes around the mountain and the surrounding forests.

Kei was alone with the nature sounds he mostly ever heard from his playlist on his headphones, _despite_ living in Miyagi. As much as he usually enjoyed any chance for reprieve, he felt unnerved. Without a map in a national park that covered much more than just the mountain? That sounded like a recipe for a disaster, _though_ Kei also knew he hiking route would eventually lead him to the shrine on top of the mountain.

Or so he hoped.

The late afternoon sun that filtered through the hovering leaves above him made Kei’s skin sweat, especially as he kept himself on the move and anxiously following the trail with the hope that he would find his group soon. As much as it was logical to stay still until he was found, there was no reason for him to expect the boneheads of his classmates even noticing he was gone. Maybe Yamaguchi, if he were to stop being so infatuated by Hinata’s radiant aura.

Kei clicked his tongue in distaste at the thought. Yamaguchi really had an awful taste, but that much was apparent as he still kept Kei around as his best friend.

As much as he liked nature, he did _not_ like the amount of walking it demanded of him, and his legs were already complaining after what felt like a half an hour of casual strolling. Kei could only take some relief from the fact that if _his_ legs were worn-out, then Kageyama’s knee must be really complaining right then as well, what with the old volleyball-induced injury and all.

Kei took a break, leaning against a large oak by the side of the trail as he tried to catch his breath. He was sure their groups wouldn’t go to the to of the mountain if everything was alright, but with one of them lost, it was the most logical thing to do. Kei grimaced. He wasn’t made for hiking up _mountains._

At least the mountain air wasn’t hard on his lungs.

Kei inhaled, deep and sharp, until he felt his lungs inflate with the air they got. Exhaling the same air out, Kei wiped his forehead, loathing the clammy feeling that clung to every part of his skin, even underneath his clothes. Summer heat was the absolute worst, and he didn’t even have bottled water with him.

Nor did he have music to fill up the silence, that was starting to become more worrisome than relaxing the more he listened to it.

That problem, as it turned out, was solved a lot quicker than Kei could have anticipated.

“…you sure you don’t need a piggy back ride, Kenma?” someone’s voice said in a low drawl, loud over the bird sounds and the rustling sounds that came from the depths of the forest surrounding Kei and the approaching people from behind him. Kei lifted his head, turned it, and adopted his usual blank expression. More people meant less chances of being lost for good.

“I told you, my ankle is fine,” another voice, more quiet and audibly much more irritated than the previous one, replied. “We’re not kids anymore, Kuro.”

“It’s not like we’re all that old either,” a third voice piped in with an obliviously cheerful tone that made Kei grimace instinctively. Ugh. Hinata-type. “Kenma-san, you act like an old man!”

“Shut up, Lev.”

Kei wiped his hands to his pants, the wet sweat only partially due to the scorching sunlight that bathed him and the path. He kept his head up, chin tilted just in the right angle to make him seem nonchalant, as though he was simply taking a piss break instead of being lost.

 _Are those even allowed in national parks? Probably not,_ Kei concluded, lips curling into a sarcastic smile when the group he had heard from a distance came to his view. Four people, all with notable height differences: the first guy was around Kei’s height, maybe a little taller with that black, tousled-up hair of his, followed by a noticeably shorter teen with blond hair, black roots showing in erratic zigzags; the third one was even taller than the first, his height undoubtedly raising brows wherever he went especially when coupled with the silvery blond hair, and the fourth one was tiny in comparison to the rest, but the way he carried himself spoke of confidence and the notion of _I will fuck you up if I need to_ as he glared at the two-meter giant beside him.

They were all wearing thick, red jerseys, and every single one of them looked like they hated life at the time. _Relatable,_ Kei thought, shuddering just from the sight of the red fabric.

“Oho, look at what the cat dragged in.” The first guy, the one with the disaster area for hair, spoke up, lips curling into a smile that was borderline smirk, easy on the eyes and irritating to the heart.

“Ooo, he’s a blond! Just your type, Kuroo-san!”

 _Oh, so he’s like that._ Kei’s lips pursed into a thin line, eyes sharp as he looked at ‘Kuroo-san’, whose face twisted in irritation at the words.

“Lev, has anyone told you that you _really_ need to learn to shut up?”

“Yaku-san has,” ‘Lev’ said with a smile unfitting for the situation, and pointed at the shortest of the group. Kei got some gratification from watching ‘Yaku’ jab ‘Lev’ straight in the ribs.

“You’re lost,” the second-shortest, who wasn’t exactly short as the rest of them were simply too tall, glanced up from the console he held between his hands, and looked at Kei with dull, bored yet perceptive eyes that quickly glanced down when they met Kei’s.

It was more of a statement than anything else, but Kei nodded tersely regardless, his fingers latching onto each other as always when he felt out of his element.

“You could say so,” he admitted, still weirded out by the jerseys these people were wearing. Were they insane? “Aren’t you hot?”

“Always,” Kuroo winked at him, gold-flecked eyes gleaming under the sunlight, and Kei only barely managed to resist the urge to roll his eyes. Kuroo’s expression shifted, just the slightest bit, as he pulled the sleeves higher, all the way to his elbows. “You seem pretty hot yourself.”

“Let’s skip this part,” Yaku interrupted with a cough, his shoulders twitching. “The jerseys are because of Kuroo’s stupid ass bet that he lost against his stupid ass friend. That’s all.”

“So a bet is worth a heat stroke,” Kei concluded with raised brows and neutral line of his lips, though he wanted to snicker at the ridiculousness of the whole thing. That was so _stupid,_ comparable to Kageyama’s sullenness at his inability to continue volleyball — or maybe even more so, because at least Kageyama’s reason was sound and almost understandable root for the bitterness that clawed at the boy.

Whereas wearing thick red jerseys under summer heat was just… irresponsible and a health hazard all around.

“We’ll take them off once we meet up with Kai, okay,” Kuroo said defensively, digging up a water bottle from the bag that had been slung over his shoulders. “Hey, you wanna have some of this? You don’t look so good, Glasses-kun.”

Kei might have been staring at the bottle like it was the last water bottle in the whole world, he realized. Kei nodded slowly, extending his hand out, and Kuroo threw it at him casually once he had properly rolled the cork in.

“Thanks,” Kei said, unscrewing the cork, and took a long sip. The water was lukewarm from being stuffed in Kuroo’s bag for who knows how long, but it did its job of providing Kei the needed hydration for the time being. The sandpaper-feeling in his throat was dissolved, as well. He returned the bottle to Kuroo, frowning as he contemplated how to formulate his next question.

Apparently, Kuroo had an idea what he was going to ask. “We’re just heading to the rendezvous point with the others from our school,” he said pleasantly, shoving the bottle into his bag while in the background, Yaku and Lev were having an argument in soft murmurs. Kei caught the words “I can’t believe this” and “you like me, Yaku-san, really” and he nearly choked on his own tongue when he caught a glimpse of Lev leaning over to peck Yaku on the cheek.

Disgustingly affectionate, and even Yaku seemed embarrassed as he shoved Lev’s face away from him in the next moment.

Kei made some sort of sound in the back of his throat, full attention back on Kuroo and his face, the curve of his mouth and the gentle flicker of sympathy in the golden, sunset-like eyes that made Kei sweat more. Irritating.

“Do you mind if I tag along?” he asked, words a low mumble as his lips thinned. “I got lost from my own group.” It was a pain to admit that to complete strangers, but he wasn’t prideful enough to keep stubbornly climbing to the shrine when he knew very well that wasn’t where he would find his schoolmates.

“Not at all,” Kuroo grinned, easy and reaching his eyes. “I was going to suggest it, you know.” Kenma, by Kuroo’s side, gave a theatrical sigh, and Kuroo elbowed him in the shoulder in one awkward movement.

“Ignore him,” Kuroo told him, all smiles and welcoming gestures, “Kenma can be a little rude.”

“If you’d stop ogling at him, I wouldn’t be,” Kenma muttered, and Kei couldn’t help the slight smirk that tugged at his lips just as Kuroo shot his friend (classmate?) a frustrated look. “It’s true, Kuro,” Kenma responded a little defensively, shrugging as his fingers worked on his 3DS.

 _I like him already,_ Kei thought to himself as a small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth, more than just a little amused.

 

* * *

 

As it turned out, Kuroo and the rest of his group were from Nekoma High School in Tokyo, and they were on a school trip as well with Mount Mitake as their first stop on the trip of two weeks. (Kei sighed internally at the coinciding time for both their schools’ trips.)

Kuroo, hair looking like it had enjoyed the comfort of a pillow not too long ago, wasn’t insufferable, either, which was a pleasant surprise despite the flippant grins that appeared on his face when Kei took a couple of seconds to look at him on their way to Nekoma’s rendezvous point.

Tan skin, expressive mouth, puberty-sculpted face; all in all, Kuroo wasn’t bad-looking at all, but what surprised Kei during the trek was how genuine Kuroo seemed, honest with his words and gestures. It was a stark contrast to how Kei was, and he couldn’t help but notice that.

“Karasuno, eh?” Kuroo’s tone was light as he pretended to think if he had ever heard of the school before. Kei kept on walking, eyes on the trodden trail before him. “Can’t say I have heard that one before.”

“Of course you wouldn’t have,” Kei said simply, a little bit of deadpan in his tone. “It’s in Miyagi.”

Yaku, on the other hand, seemed to perk up at the mention of Karasuno, taking four huge steps (for him) to reach Kei and Kuroo. “Karasuno?” he repeated, warm brown eyes glinting under the visor of his hat. “Any chance that you know of a third-year student called Sugawara then, Tsukishima-kun?”

“He’s one of the third years that volunteered as the caretakers for this trip,” Kei replied, watching as Yaku’s lips curled into the first real smile Kei had seen on his face so far. It was like watching the sun rise in the morning, slow build-up to the brightness of the afternoon sun. It was kind of awkward to witness someone’s joy up close, especially when it was as blinding as this.

Being the emotionally constipated teenager that he was, Kei found it disgusting.

“Wait, what?” Kuroo seemed as confused by this ridiculous coincidence as Kei was. “You know someone from his school, Yaku?”

“Suga-kun,” Yaku nodded, and Lev whined petulantly behind them. Everyone ignored him, and Kei got the impression that Lev was feeling forlorn over losing Yaku’s attention, like a puppy when its owner was reading a newspaper instead of playing with it. “He’s been my penpal from a young age… Well, email pal these days. He mentioned something about a school trip, but he didn’t go into anything specific in his last message.” Yaku adjusted the straps of his bag on his shoulders, smiling to himself. “I can’t believe he didn’t tell me he was going to come here today.”

Kei didn’t know the said third year all that well, only from his looks: silver-like hair that would glow softly under sunlight, eyes that were gently perceptive, not disruptive in their inspection, smiles that could disarm the most hardened person.

Also (well-meaning) punches hard enough to bruise an upper arm for days if you were being dumb in Sugawara’s vicinity. (A slight exaggeration, if you will.)

Or if you happened to be Sawamura Daichi, but that was another story altogether.

“Ah,” Kuroo made a sound of acknowledgment, nodding his head. “Guess we can hope to meet your babe when we find our mates first.”

“He’s not my ‘babe’, Kuroo.”

“Isn’t that a Lady Gaga song? And right, your babe is right here."

“ _Kuroo,_ for fuck’s sake.”

Kei just hoped he would find his way back to his own group soon; at least there he was familiar with the feeling of being outcast, of not being one of them. The familiarity of being alone in the midst of almost-friends, if Yamaguchi wasn’t counted. (Most of the time, he wasn’t; he had grown comfortable with the rest of the first years, laughing together with Yachi and Hinata, though still silently making fun of the broody Kageyama with Kei.)

 

* * *

 

Coincidences didn’t end at Yaku and Sugawara’s unexpected letter-initiated friendship: another was their respective rendezvous points being the shrine high in the mountain.

Sugawara practically deflated from relief when he caught sight of Kei, immediately rushing over to flick at his nose. “Geesh, Tsukishima!” Sugawara’s face twisted with worried relief as he shoved a water bottle to Kei’s hands. “We were all worried about your disappearance.”

“Sorry,” Kei muttered, aware of everyone’s stares and Hinata’s loud guffaws of _who would get lost here_. (Joke was on him, as he too had gotten lost, which Kei would find out later.)

Sugawara’s hand tilted Kei’s head up, eyes flickering as they glanced at Kei’s throat. “You should drink up, Tsukishima,” he said, more collected now that Kei had returned with his usual nonchalance. “Asahi was so sure you had been caught by whatever serial killer’s running in the forests of the national park. Good thing the _negative beard_ was wrong as always!” Sugawara laughed, his last words directed at the tall, hand-wringing third year little ways from them.

“H-hey, to be fair, it’s a legitimate concern!” Asahi grimaced, his hands agitatedly pulling at each other as Sugawara smiled at him and took some pity by walking over and patting his shoulder, leaving Kei stand alone again after the initial chaos that had followed his return to his schoolmates.

Kei rolled his eyes at the chaos that had erupted from the two schools meeting up; _apparently_ the teachers knew each other through some odd connections, as coincidental as Sugawara and Yaku’s letter exchange. Go figure. Maybe with some luck, someone would end up finding their soulmate in the other school’s student or teacher population.

Yamaguchi was completely enraptured by Hinata and his animated gestures and laugh; honestly, it pissed Kei off a little bit, but he wouldn’t say anything if only because he didn’t like the whining and lingering glances that would ensue when Yamaguchi was pulled away from his sunshine boy.

“You’re looking awfully lonely out here.” Oh, good. It was Kuroo. Kei glanced at him, a politely neutral expression on his lips even despite his inward appreciation of Kuroo’s pleasing features, which now included a nice set of forearms that the red jersey had covered before. Kei pointedly refused to look at the strong lines of biceps that could very well compete with Sawamura’s if put to test. “Mind if I join you?”

Kuroo’s voice had gone through the puberty. Whether his personality had was questionable, but Kei didn’t think he would find that out.

Nevertheless, it was pleasant to listen to.

“You would do as you like, just like everyone else, even if I said no,” Kei shrugged, shoulders slumping in a small show of surrender, glancing at Kuroo as he stepped into Kei’s personal space. “I see you got rid of the jersey, Kuroo-san.”

“Yeah, couldn’t handle the heat anymore,” Kuroo sighed, making a distressed sound in the back of his throat and giving a visible shudder to enforce the impression. “I hate Bokuto so, _so_ much. But at least he got the photographic proof that we did it.”

“Your classmates must really hate you for pulling them into it,” Kei said, snickering under his breath and hiding his mouth behind his clammy palm. Kuroo’s indignant wheeze indicated he had heard it, though, as did the elbow nudge to Kei’s side.

“You’re a rude kid, aren’t you?” But Kuroo was smiling, his head turned enough for Kei to see the warmth in his eyes and the curve of his lips as well as the dimples. As a fifteen-year-old, there was hardly anything that could make him breathless outside the P.E., but Kuroo did steal his breath right then by looking at him like that, warm and friendly and all around the perfect image of a ‘nice guy’.

Polar opposite of Kei, honestly.

“Just ask Hinata,” Kei said, shrugging and nodding at the same time, something warm creeping onto his face as the light summer breeze fanned at his face, the touch as pleasant as the touch of water on his tongue earlier. The suffocating feeling of the sun’s warmth eased off a little, made breathing a little less laborious, but no less dehydrating. “He’s sure to complain about how _obnoxious_ I am, that hypocrite.”

The harshness of his words contrasted the deadpan expression on his face, if the minor twitching of his eyebrows were ignored. Kuroo didn’t, and he laughed long and hard. “Nah, I don’t think his perception of you is exactly on the mark there.”

“You must be really bad at reading people,” Kei said with only a hint of mocking to his tone, lips pulling into a small smirk. He didn’t usually engage in playful banter, as the idiots would take it too far (Hinata and Kageyama), and he didn’t intend to continue it now either.

“I’d like to think I’m pretty good,” Kuroo shrugged modestly.

Kei couldn’t help but laugh. “Sure you are, Kuroo-san.”

Kuroo didn’t respond, but Kei could see his smile, and that made his heartbeat accelerate. _Stupid._

 

* * *

 

“Did you know that wildcats do not meow? That it’s actually the home cat’s way of communicating with us lowly humans?” At some point, Kuroo had made it a point to start rambling about the interesting lives of felines, his voice enthusiastic and so stupidly proud that Kei didn’t bother to tell him to shut up. Also, while cats weren’t dinosaurs, the facts Kuroo dished out were… interesting. Far more interesting than Hinata’s volleyball-related rants and Kageyama’s emotional constipation.

Kei bit back a smile. He had the reputation of a Disgruntled Teenage Boy to uphold, after all. He couldn’t afford to let Kuroo know that he was, in fact, genuinely amused. “You know a lot about cats, Kuroo-san,” he said, his voice flat but his posture open: hands relaxed at his sides, head tilted towards Kuroo’s direction, a relatively mild expression on his face.

“Of course,” Kuroo blinked at him. “Cats are… _cats,_ Tsukishima-kun.”

Kuroo’s tone was that of utter fascination and fondness.

It didn’t take much to guess what Kuroo’s favourite animal was, then. Kei’s lips curled into a small smirk, a snicker hiding behind his mouth but wanting to get out.

“Not everyone’s a cat person, Kuroo-san,” Kei shrugged, even though he was, more or less, a cat person. Would he admit it to Kuroo, though? Absolutely not, especially when Kuroo’s face took on such a flabbergasted, bewildered expression. Kei managed to keep his usual pokerface with some difficulty.

“Blasphemy,” Kuroo whispered to himself. “Please don’t tell me you’re a dog person like Inuoka.” Kuroo’s face distorted in mock pain as he clutched his chest, waiting for Kei to land the final blow.

It was amusing.

Kei didn’t remember a time when he had hit it off this well with someone he hadn’t known since childhood.

“Not at all,” Kei grimaced, as though the very thought disgusted him. The background noises from the fellow students and the teachers seemed almost nonexistent when Kuroo was around. Kei didn’t even need his (dysfunctional) headphones. _A small miracle_. “Dogs are like Hinata, over-eager and in need of supervision all the time. I don’t need that kind of mess. Unfortunately, my brother has a golden retriever.”

Kuroo actually laughed, and instinctively his arm almost went around Kei’s shoulders. On the last second, Kuroo seemed to catch himself, dropping his arm back to his side. “The little guy that’s jumping around Kenma like a little pup? Yeah, I guess I can see some resemblance.”

“Yeah,” Kei sniffed, though his face kept its neutral expression. “That’s Hinata, alright.”

The forest didn’t offer as much relief as Kei would have liked: sweat lingered on his face like an annoying parasite and made everything much more uncomfortable. Kei only barely resisted the urge to ask for another sip from Sugawara’s water bottle.

At least he hadn’t been insane enough to wear a jersey, he thought as he glanced at the glistening drops of sweat on Kuroo’s biceps.

“So, you guys are staying for two weeks?” Kuroo asked.

Kei nodded.

“Any chance you could sneak out to go around Tokyo with me on occasion?” Kuroo’s smirk was confident, showing off his teeth, but Kuroo’s fidgeting fingers gave him away. Kei pretended he didn’t notice the obvious nervousness radiating off of the other.

It was sad, watching a third-year student fumbling like a fool.

“I don’t think we’ll have a lot of free time,” Kei dodged the suggestion. To be fair, Kuroo’s company wouldn’t be terrible, but Kei wasn’t looking for a friendship or any other kind of relationship. It was easy to keep himself distant when he didn’t give anyone a chance to get close.

“Oh, okay.” Kuroo’s shoulders slumped, his confidence deflated, and he didn’t bother to pretend to not be disappointed. “That’s too bad, ‘coz I know pretty good ramen places all around Tokyo, and I could probably give a better tour than your teachers.”

“Too bad,” Kei echoed Kuroo’s words, looking away and his gaze meeting Yamaguchi’s — the other first year had been looking at them for a while, Kei realized and his skin prickled with what was mostly embarrassed irritation. Yamaguchi sure liked to notice him when he didn’t particularly want to be noticed.

The noise around them grew in volume after silence fell between Kuroo and Kei, or at least it seemed to, and an ache thudded behind Kei’s eyes as he fiddled with the cord of his headphones.

 _This is going to be annoying,_ Kei thought for the umpteenth time as he idly took a napkin to wipe his hands with.


	2. when i was down on my knees

Kei had bid farewell to Kuroo and the rest of Nekoma (though he hadn’t talked to them outside of Kuroo’s group) with his classmates, and that was supposed to be that. A chance meeting at a national park after getting separated from his group. Kuroo would remain as a passer-by in Kei’s life, and Kei would forget him in a couple of days if he was allowed to.

As it turned out, Kei wasn’t.

“Oh, my God,” Kuroo sounded way too smug as Kei dragged his luggage into the hotel room besides Kuroo’s. “Look at what the cat dragged in, Kenma.”

 _What the hell,_ Kei wondered, glancing at Yamaguchi, who seemed amused by the chance meeting rather than irritated and jumpy like Kei.

“It’s nice to see you again, Kuroo-san,” Yamaguchi, the traitor, chirped. (Though Kei found Kuroo to be fairly pleasant, although annoyingly talkative, he still wouldn’t call this second encounter _nice_ or _wanted_. Alas, life liked to throw Kuroo in his way, apparently.) “Tsukki, say hi too.”

“You’re not my mother, Yamaguchi,” Kei hissed under his breath, quiet enough for only his friend to catch it. Yamaguchi only grinned in return, albeit a little tentatively as though he was just now considering the possibility of Kei retaliating. “Hey,” Kei said to Kuroo, bowing his head a little while pretending Kuroo’s smile didn’t make him feel a little better after the horrid bus trip to the hotel from the museum they had first dropped by simply because “well, since we’re passing by!”

Thanks, Takeda-sensei.

“Hey, you,” Kuroo said back, and his friend (Kenma) rolled his eyes, looking as pained as Kei felt on the inside.

“Uh.” Kei immediately wished that he had said something smarter. “Why are you here?”

Kuroo’s golden eyes tinkled like the stars Akiteru had pointed out to him when they were both younger and friendlier with each other. Kei reluctantly acknowledged that it was fairly attractive, objectively speaking. “Fate has led me to your doorsteps obviously.”

“Bye,” Kei deadpanned as he entered the room he shared, unfortunately, with several of his classmates — Yamaguchi, Hinata, and Kageyama. The former he wouldn’t have minded so much, but the latter two got on his nerves: Hinata for not getting that Yamaguchi was hopelessly crushing on him, and Kageyama for being moody about his injury even after all the weeks he had been spending on recovering.

“Sorry, he’s just really tired,” he could hear Yamaguchi murmuring to Kuroo and Kenma (family name was something like Kozume if Kei remembered the introductions right) before Yamaguchi followed and closed the door behind them.

“Tsukkiiiiiii…”

“I’m not in the mood to deal with people,” Kei said, shrugging. “At least Hinata and Kageyama aren’t here yet. I’ll take the second bedroom.”

Before Yamaguchi could say anything more, Kei had walked into the second bedroom of their shared hotel room, closing the door behind him as he managed his luggage with one hand.

Only then, behind closed doors, did he sigh and close his eyes and allow himself some time to figure out why Kuroo wasn’t as repulsive as teenagers generally tended to be. Okay, he was smelly for sure (the jersey stunt had been _very_ stupid) and he smirked like he thought he was a big deal, but he talked nicer than what his appearance suggested.

 _Nice_. There it was, that word.

Kei smiled depreciatively to himself. _Yeah, keep on dreaming. If he sticks around, he’ll notice your cactus-like personality._

And Kuroo didn’t seem like a person that liked cacti very much.

 

* * *

 

The hotel itself was okay, just modern and luxurious enough to have pools both outside and inside; as expected, they were both hopelessly crowded, and Kei didn’t even dream of going for a swim in either.

Hinata, on the other hand, wasn’t bothered so easily.

“Oh, c’mon, Tsukishima,” Hinata’s lips curled into a pout that could rivaly any puppy’s pseudo-sad expressions any day. “Get a little sun! You need it.”

“We have an early day tomorrow,” Kei argued, lips pulling into a frown when Yamaguchi didn’t take his side on this. Of course not, he was probably looking forward to breaking some rules with Hinata and Kageyama. The latter was mostly oblivious to the existence of those, though. “I’m not getting myself in trouble just because you idiots want to fool around like kids.”

“We _are_ kids,” Hinata argued back, “you, me, Kageyama, and Yamaguchi too!”

“We’re _fifteen_.”

“Basically kids! Also I’m _sixteen._ ”

“You sure don’t act like it,” Kei snickered, and Hinata’s face reddened visibly. Kei relished in the sight before shrugging and returning to one of the books he had gotten with him to the trip as a way to kill time. “Like I said, you can just go off on your own. Maybe ask Yachi to come with you while you’re at it.” _Also get out of my room,_ Kei thought sourly, though he knew he would inevitably have to share as the two rooms (spaces, really) both had only two beds.

Maybe Kageyama wouldn’t mind taking the couch.

“Tsukki, pleaseeeee.” Yamaguchi wasn’t above begging, it seemed, and Kei almost felt bad as Yamaguchi gave him a painfully hopeful, wide-eyed look that said _please I can’t go alone with Hinata and Kageyama please save me._ “It will be fun! And after that we can get dinner with the third years!”

Kei glanced at the bed he picked for himself, inwardly sighing in surrender as Yamaguchi fidgeted. “Fine, but I won’t be swimming.”

 

 

 

Well, that’s what Kei had said.

Turns out he was terribly, _terribly_ wrong.

The outdoor pool had been surprisingly empty considering the time of year and the number of people as hotel guests, and the clear blue water had even looked inviting as Kei adjusted the collar of his shirt, wishing for some relief from the sweltering evening sun already.

Hinata and the others had changed into their swimming trunks while Kei opted to wait for them at the pool, ignoring the few people that hung out there, some of them being the people from Nekoma he had met earlier. Yaku and Lev, Kei remembered as the taller of the students rambled loudly something about the scorching sun and how nice it was to spend summertime like this.

Kei sat down on one of the plastic benches at the side of the pool, fanning himself with his hand as he regretted not taking the novel down with him. The story was ridiculous, featuring time traveling and transformation sequences, but at least there were dinosaurs to make up for the inane plot and romance that fell flat.

There were no dinosaurs to save Kei from his classmates.

“Hey, Tsukishima-kun.”

_Oh, no._

(Oh, yes.)

Kei lifted his head, his eyes meeting Kuroo’s in a fleeting moment before Kei shifted his gaze just a little to the side. “Kuroo-san,” he acknowledged neutrally, though the jumping sensation inside his chest wasn’t all negative. “Nice to see you again.”

“Pft, don’t be so stiff, Tsukishima-kun,” Kuroo sing-songed, his intonation all over the place just like his hair. “Though it’s a pain to call you that, so uh, can I call you Tsukki for short? Tsukki-kun’s fine by me, too, if that’s what you’d prefer.”

 _He tries so hard that it’s sad._ Kei gave him a guarded look-over, before nodding just enough for the movement to be seen. “Tsukki’s fine.” Yamaguchi called him that too; the nickname was almost endearing to the ear at this point, after so many years.

To hear it said by Kuroo, though, now that was different than Yamaguchi’s sometimes meek, sometimes irritatingly _loud_ way of uttering the name.

It was obvious Kuroo had already gone through the awkward phase in puberty where his voice would crack and alternate between awkward high tones and embarrassing low mumbles. He had reached the comfortable time of “my voice sure is nice on your ears, isn’t it”, and Kei resented it. Just a bit. Because his own voice cracked on occasion, and _that_ was doubly annoying since Hinata and Yamaguchi kept laughing about it. Yachi, too, though she at least was more discreet about it.

Kei sighed and shifted just so that Kuroo could sit beside him if he so wanted, while ignoring the elated expression that lit up the other’s face more than enough to rival the sun.

Kei was loathe to admit that it was a nice sight, but he was, in general, very loathe to admit much of anything.

“Tsukki,” Kuroo hummed, his tone mildly surprised but undeniably pleased, as he sat down and — well, dang — it was only now that Kei took notice of how little Kuroo was wearing.

Only swimming trunks.

The rest of Kuroo was just _very_ aesthetically pleasing skin, tan and smooth-looking, and probably the cause of death for a very confused fifteen-year-old country bumpkin like Tsukishima Kei.

 _I’m out_ , Kei thought, always unwilling to explore the new territories of life, especially the social sides of it.

That was what he would have liked to do, but Kuroo kept initiating conversations, and Kei wasn’t enough of a jerk to keep blowing him off. (You could call it a senpai privilege, if you wanted to go that far; that’s what Kuroo was, though from another school.)

What Kei learned, and what he had already deduced before, was that Kuroo’s jokes were awful, awful enough to rouse a surprised laugh from Kei’s mouth, his lips twitching with the effort to keep it in but failing spectacularly in the end as the sound reverberated in and out of his throat.

“So, of course Kenma ditches me for a _game_ ,” Kuroo complained when Hinata and the rest of the dweeb squad came. (Really, Kei didn’t hate them. Really.) “I swear, for a childhood friend, he sure loves his PSP more than he does me.”

Kenma was the one with the bleached hair and slowly conquering roots, Kei remembered.

“I just know better, Kuro.”

Kei and Kuroo both visibly jumped, nearly out of their skins, when Kenma’s voice piped in, tone flat and disinterested but hiding a bit of amusement.

“Holy shit, Kenma!” Kuroo groaned, making a face as he turned to look at Kenma that stood by his side. Kenma wasn’t in his swimming trunks, but wore an old tee and a pair of jeans that looked a little too big on him. “Don’t scare me like that, fuck.”

“I have been here for the past three minutes or so,” Kenma stared at Kuroo like the other was stupid. “It’s not my fault you’re so infatuated with Tsukishima.”

“I’m not—!” Kuroo sputtered, nose scrunching up in embarrassment as he threw a wary glance at Kei, who was trying his best not to laugh outright at the scene unfolding right beside him. “It’s not every day that I meet a nice guy from another prefecture, Kenma. Let me make friends. Friendships are cool.”

“Unlike you.”

“ _Wow_.”

Watching Kenma and Kuroo’s battle of wits (an unstoppable force meeting an immovable object) relieved some of the pessimism that had been strangling Kei’s guts for the majority of the day — if Kuroo wasn’t included, as he seemed to have an uncanny ability to coax some emotion other than irritation out of Kei.

It was weird, but it was also going to die off pretty fast the longer Kuroo hung around.

“Hey, Kenma!” It was Hinata’s turn to cut them off as he practically hopped over to the bench, a bright grin on his face thanks to Kenma’s presence or so Kei figured. He couldn’t even call it pathetic, because, well, he actually understood Hinata in this case.

Kei looked at Kuroo’s profile thoughtfully, tuning out the incessant chatter of Hinata’s. Tuning out the rest of the noisy world, in fact.

Kuroo threw glances at him, noticed his stare, and Kei stiffened in embarrassment, fingers clenching and curling on his lap. The air smelled like chlorine and sweat and evening air — it wasn’t enjoyable, not even particularly memorable, but later that evening Kei would still be able to recall the exact feeling in his nostrils. Just like how he would remember the shade of gold in Kuroo’s irises, the dilated pupils, and a forced posture as Kuroo obviously wanted to say something to him, anything at all.

He would remember not minding the physical closeness between them as much as he usually did.

And that would keep him up, stray wonderings tugging at the corners of his mind as his eyes found their way to the moonlight spilling into the room, cool and gentle and nothing like Kei regardless of his name.

(He would be angry, before that, at Hinata for pushing him into the pool, for laughing like there was no tomorrow to come; he would keep his silence with Kageyama, who had found some glee in the event; he wouldn’t be able to do that with Yamaguchi, whose crush on Hinata was ever so obvious and sad in a youthful kind of way.)

 

* * *

 

The next day began the main purpose of the trip: the visits to museums and theaters and everything that there was to be seen in Tokyo. (Which turned out to be a whole lot, and Kei could feel his skin begin to itch with the need to get away.)

As big of a surprise as meeting Nekoma high schoolers at the hotel had been, that was as far as the coincidences went, and Kei was free from Kuroo’s company. (Unfortunately, he would have preferred Kuroo around when it came to handling Hinata… and Yamaguchi, who kept giving shit-eating grins at Kei when he spaced out.)

The heat from the previous day came back even harsher around noon, and it was no exaggeration to say that Kei would have preferred coffin to the museums that lacked air condition and were stacked with people that had nothing better to do with their free time.

His classmates were lively as usual: Hinata could talk on and on about the cool stuff in the modern art museum, but mostly the topic of the day seemed to center around Kenma, whereas Kageyama would be quiet or grunt out irritable responses and fight Hinata on absolutely anything, and Yamaguchi… well, Yamaguchi busied himself with teasing Kei about the previous day’s encounter and how _starstruck_ he had “seemed”.

“Shut up, Yamaguchi.”

“No, Tsukki, it’s a very good thing,” Yamaguchi chirped, grinning from ear to ear as they were returning to the bus, walking behind the third years that had come along to look after them. “Making new friends is good.”

“Like how you have befriended Hinata?” Kei sneered, watching Yamaguchi flinch and his face flush a little at the peaks of his cheeks. “Yeah, thought so.”

“Hey, I _am_ friends with him!” Yamaguchi said defensively as he wriggled his arms, eyes downcast and lips forming a sullen line. “I just — you know—”

“I know, I know,” Kei heaved out the words. As if Yamaguchi’s feelings weren’t transparent as hell, Hinata-wise or not.

As if on cue, Hinata bounced over to them to show off the souvenirs he got from the museum, eyes wide and contented while he talked Yamaguchi’s ears off while Kei wondered what it was about the other that Yamaguchi found attractive. Maybe it was the unnaturally bright hair. Maybe it was the smile that was as naive as it was genuine. Maybe Yamaguchi just liked childishness.

Kei sighed.

He might never come to understand the logic behind that crush.

 

* * *

 

Kuroo was there when they came back to the hotel, the eyebags under his eyes a telltale sign of lost sleep and the frown on his face of deep level of irritation.

It was the game room, and Kuroo was playing table tennis against Haiba Lev, the giant first-year Nekoma student that hovered over even Kei. (Kei held irrational resentment for that.)

Lev’s excitement was palpable in the air, in his speech, in his rapid gestures when he requested for Kei and others to cheer him on as he would “kick Kuroo-san’s ass for once and for all in his own game”. Yaku, on the sidelines, seemed to suffer from an ever-growing headache as he plopped down on a chair and held his head between his hands. Sugawara, who had trudged into the room after Kei and his group, took pity and went to his friend, all smiles and claps on Yaku’s shoulder.

Kuroo looked like he wanted to kick Lev’s ass in the most literal sense of the phrase.

Kei snickered into his hand. The sight was just too funny to overlook with a blank stare and a shrug.

After an exhausting day in the equally exhaustingly populated capital of Japan, everyone could use a little bit of fun, and so Kei settled to watch the match unfolding before his eyes, not entirely ignorant to the brief glances Kuroo awarded him with on occasion. It killed his focus a little, resulting in Lev whooping like an excited child, his voice clear and audible even over all the other noise in the room, over the chatter of adults that threw them weakly veiled glares.

“Kuroo-san, get your head in the game!” Lev cackled, and Kuroo sighed.

Kei felt the tiniest bud of sympathy blooming in his chest, unraveling as Kuroo’s tired eyes stole more eye contact from him. Specks of gold flickered as the corners of the narrow eyes crinkled in a relieved smile.

“This isn’t High School Musical, Lev,” Kuroo drawled, hand on his hip as he rolled his shoulders before positioning himself again.

“We know who would be Troy and Gabriella, if it were,” Kenma, by Hinata’s side, muttered. Kei had noticed it, but it still struck him just by how quickly Hinata tended to befriend people. _Amazing,_ he thought, and only some of it was sarcasm. Most of it might have been jealousy, as Kei had never been good with people of his age. Turning his head, Kei inspected Yamaguchi for a while, trying to discern anything unhappy on his friend’s face and posture.

Yamaguchi didn’t seem perturbed in the least; if anything, he seemed happy, and even snorted at Kenma’s words. “Tsukki, I think he means you.”

“They,” Kuroo corrected, clearing his throat.

“Oh, sorry,” Yamaguchi made a face of utter mortification before turning towards Kenma with apologies already raining from his lips.

“Don’t worry,” Kenma shrugged, nonchalant. “Everyone makes that mistake, and you didn’t know.”

Kei wasn’t sure what he had expected. Jealousy wasn’t Yamaguchi’s vice, it was his. It was as ugly as it came, a strangling sensation that came up on occasion when he looked at Yamaguchi and saw the good and the best in the anxious teen while all he saw in himself was the worst, the most hideous things — or what people viewed as _bad_ things, anyway: cynicism isn’t attractive, sarcasm is hurtful, independence close to loneliness.

“Tsukki!” Kei tore his gaze away from his friend, startled by the call, and looked at Kuroo with wide eyes, eyebrows knitting down in wonder. Kuroo’s grin made the uneasiness unfurl, if only a little. “Cheer me on, will you? I need to knock an underclassman down a notch.”

“How petty,” Kei raised his brows at the other, and Kuroo responded by laughing, the sound ringing in Kei’s ears even moments after it was over. It was full of life, healthy and deep from Kuroo’s lungs, deep from his being perhaps.

 _Nonsense,_ Kei pushed the last thought aside.

“Cheer me on,” Kuroo repeated his request, not offended in the slightest, and Kei found that part of him to be attractive, easy to take in. Troubling.

“Fine,” Kei sighed, made it look like it was the last thing he wanted to do even as Kuroo smiled at him like he had granted his eternal wish.

Kuroo did, in the end, show Lev who was the reigning table tennis champion of Nekoma High School, much to the younger’s chagrin and sadness. It was a tight match, from what Kei could tell as he watched the ball swing back and forth between the two players.

The room was full of life, mostly because of Kuroo; the radiance of youthful, ridiculous joy after winning thegame was contagious, and while Kei scoffed at it, he couldn’t keep a sour face when Kuroo, in his excitement, wrapped an arm over Kei’s shoulders and squeezed, laughed something into Kei’s ears that no one else caught.

(”You’re like a lucky charm, Tsukki.”)

It took a moment to remind himself to breathe after Kuroo had pulled away and gone over to Yaku, who had his hands full of whining Lev.

It took another moment to remember that he had only known Kuroo for two days.

It didn’t take long for Kei to feel disgusted with himself.

* * *

 

The mornings were simple, quiet and cool even despite the rising sun that sent its light into their shared hotel room. The light scattered over the furniture, over Kageyama’s sleeping figure, over Keis luggage and the papers and notes from various places: museums, botanic gardens, a theater, the national park.

The mosaic of leaflets and brochures only grew larger with each passing day, as did Kei’s notes on the journal teachers were making them write, but would undoubtedly only take a glance at between their other, more urgent assignments.

Kei was an early bird, but that didn’t mean waking up wasn’t difficult. Full-blown consciousness came to him in small fits, between minutes of drifting in and out of sleep, between dreamlike memories of Kuroo’s smile and the feeling of not being judged for once this year.

Between full awareness and the memories, Kei thought he would like to hang out with Kuroo during the actual summer break, outside from any school trips and classmates. It was a fanciful musing like childhood dreams and childish faith in the older sibling (they can do no wrong, until they do) with a mixture of something more hormonal, something that Kei felt he should be repulsed by but wasn’t. Kuroo was —

Kei’s eyes would always open before he could finish that thought entirely, before it could fill him and his heart up.

 

 

Mornings included wandering to Hinata and Yamaguchi’s side of the room and tiptoeing over the scattered articles of clothing as he went to the bathroom to wash his face and brush his teeth. He would be finished with one or both of those when Yamaguchi would come in with messy, pointy hair and droopy eyes and hoarse voice that would always say, “Good morning, Tsukki.”

Crucial parts of mornings were hand cream and being mocked for it by the idiot duo (”who uses _hand cream_ , Tsukishima?” “I do, shut up”) as well as ordering breakfast from the room service because climbing downstairs was that much of a pain.

It was somewhere around the middle of the meal that Kuroo and Kenma would knock on the door and step in, both in their pajamas as they now knew it was fine with the first years.

The first time Kei had protested, embarrassed and irritated, but Hinata was impossible to refuse: he was adamant on spending as much time as possible with his new friend Kenma.

Kuroo’s presence in the room wasn’t as intrusive as Kei had thought it might feel. It was awkward, of course, but it washed away when everyone laughed at the disaster that was Kuroo’s hair in the morning. It was _that_ bad — the spikes pointing in every possible direction, curling down and up, and Kei was reminded of some card game anime protagonist when he watched Kuroo. (He made the effort to tell Kuroo that, which resulted in a huffed “It’s not _that_ bad!”)

Friday morning followed the pattern, being the third day Kuroo and Kenma had come around for breakfast with snacks of their own, Kenma still in his pajamas while Kuroo had bothered to change into loose jeans and a nondescript tee.

Kei ate as much as he always did, which was less than most people, which Kuroo took notice of, if his worried frowns were anything to go by. Kei willfully ignored them; he had heard enough of _please eat more_ in the past already.

Kei’s stiffness didn’t stop Kuroo from offering him snacks, though, and Kei stared mournfully at the strawberry flavored lollipops before heaving out a sigh and taking two of them.

“Strawberry kind of guy, huh?” Kuroo mused, lips pulling into a shit-eating smirk, and Kei opted to roll his eyes in response as he unwrapped one of the lollipops with some fumbling. “That’s kinda cute,” he added in a low murmur, voice sweet around the syllables, and bright eyes crinkling in earnest adoration.

“Hardly,” Kei disagreed, his hand brushing against Kuroo’s as they both picked up a cookie from the tray they had put down in the middle of the circle made up by their group. Peculiarly, the others might have as well have ceased to exist: Kei didn’t notice them like he noticed Kuroo and his every gesture and breath.

In the morning light, even with bags under his eyes, Kuroo was…

Kei had no idea where that thought would go if he allowed it to trail forward, so he ended it there as Kuroo’s shoulder bumped against his own when the older boy whispered something to him, something that Kei in his distraction didn’t catch. It sounded something like _you’re cute_ , but Kei wasn’t delusional enough to think that Kuroo had actually said that, even though he could see Kuroo had taken a strange liking to him.

“You are,” Kuroo said solemnly, “very cute, Tsukki.”

Well.

Kei wasn’t as delusional as he thought he was, then.


	3. following, following, following

“I,” Kei began once they got out from an elevator, “have a problem.”

“Are you constipated?”

“I wasn’t talking to you, Hinata,” Kei hissed as Yamaguchi laughed by his side, hard enough to make tears well up in his eyes. “Yamaguchi, _shut up._ ”

“Please, listen to your elders, Tsukishima-kun,” Hinata mocked, eyebrows wriggling as he, too, snickered into his hand. It was obvious he and Yamaguchi had their own idea as to what Kei wanted to talk about, while Kageyama remained completely ignorant. Bless that moron. “Ask advice, and you shall receive.”

Hinata’s falsely sage-like voice got on Kei’s nerves, but knowing that he wouldn’t get time alone with Yamaguchi anytime soon, he sighed and gave up. It was important to pick your battles.

Yachi, who had been busy with her own anxieties before, nudged Hinata gently, her face pale. “Hinata-kun, that’s rude.”

“Is not,” Hinata mumbled, pouting, and Yachi giggled under her breath while Yamaguchi sighed wistfully.

 _What a group we are,_ Kei thought, _teenage morons with normal teenage worries about crushes and school and how badly the sun’s going to burn us._

Whether or not they were anything close to being friends was another story altogether, but there was some safety in having a group to surround oneself with. The abundant amount of chatter was the most prominent minus, but Kei had yet to shake them off.

Once they were out from the Tokyo Tower (Hinata and Kageyama both had been ridiculously excited, though Kei had a sneaking suspicion the latter had thought there was something volleyball-esque going on), Kei began his whispered tale of his problem.

“I think Kuroo-san likes me.”

Well, no one had ever said tales had to be long.

“How’s _that_ a problem?” Hinata blinked, his hands stopping their gesticulations. “And, uh, sorry to say, but it is kinda obvious. I mean, jeesh, that guy has been looking at you like a lovestruck centipede—”

Kei threw Yamaguchi a look. _We watched a weird animated movie last night,_ Yamaguchi mouthed at him, sheepish and flustered look spreading on his face when Hinata’s shoulder bumped against his upper arm.

“—and I swear to god he’s like that woman from the Bee movie—”

“Don’t compare Kuroo-san to that bee lover,” Kei interjected irritably, hands over his chest as he glared at his not-friend. His hands were damp with sweat, and his tried to wipe them on Kageyama’s shirt, but Kageyama had learned to dodge him in the past week already. “Kuroo-san is, well.” Kei pursed his lips as their bus came into view. “He’s…”

“Oh, my God,” Yamaguchi gasped. “Tsukki likes him _back_.”

“I have known him for four days!”

“Almost five,” Yamaguchi noted, blinking innocently. “Tsukki, there’s nothing wrong with that. He’s a guy, you’re a guy, he’s pretty hot, you’re pretty good yourself—”

“ _Yamaguchi…_ ”

“Minus the hot part,” Hinata added, giggling, “Kuroo-san’s bedhead is like Kageyama’s attention span.”

“Huh?” As if on cue, Kageyama snapped out of his daze, and glared at Hinata. “What the hell, Hinata!”

“Unimpressive and laughable,” Kei agreed, laughing outright as Kageyama glowered at him.

The discussion about Kei’s sort-of, not-really (minus the sort-of and not) crush on Kuroo died off just like that — it went past their minds just like the brief breeze of air and the sounds of a particularly busy block around — but the uneasy restlessness that had taken hold of Kei refused to go as the image of Kuroo’s obnoxiously grinning face fluttered through his mind like a ghost that refused to stop its hauntings.

 

* * *

 

The irrefutable fact of the matter was that unlike most people in Kei’s life, Kuroo actually made him feel at ease. Sure enough, he was kind of dumb and silly and not above saying things that could hurt (so far it hadn’t happened, but Kei knew it would as Kuroo seemed to enjoy driving people up the walls), but he was also kinder than his narrow eyes and sharp jawline would suggest.

So Kei didn’t really care when Yamaguchi ditched him and Kuroo on the early Saturday afternoon to “tour around with Hinata and Kenma”, which then turned into Sugawara going along as he worried they might get lost. And, of course, if Suga was going to go, so wa Yaku, who actually knew Tokyo. And that led into most of Karasuno and Nekoma’s third years tagging along.

Which left Kei and Kuroo pretty much to their own devices as far others were concerned.

Kei didn’t mind it, he had been wanting to be alone with Kuroo. The feeling had been a strange surge in his veins, a bubble stuck in his throat that wanted to get out and float free or burst before it could be freed.

So they strolled around the hotel, stopped by the gardens that opened up in the backyard: the sound of trickling drops of water soothing to their ears, the cool air gentle on their skins, lush green dominating over other colors.

It was peaceful, sitting on a towel by Kuroo’s side, laughing at whatever things came out from either Kuroo’s or his own mouth, occasionally holding his breath when their hands brushed against one another, fingers twitching with the want to touch more.

“You know,” Kuroo sighed eventually with the air of a young man that had grown tired of trying to figure a math problem out, “you’re a tough nut to crack, Tsukki.”

Kei made a face. “You’ve been listening to Tchaikovsky.”

Kuroo’s arm around Kei’s waist tightened a little, and Kei pretended his heart didn’t jump. Six days, he had known Kuroo for almost six days, this was not supposed to be happening with someone he had known for less than a week. (As if laws of attraction were below him.)

“Maybe,” Kuroo admitted, “but _Nutcracker_ is pretty nice, so…”

“The point?” Kei cleared his throat, though he couldn’t help laughing at the grin splayed on Kuroo’s face: ridiculously attractive, ridiculously _happy_ , ridiculously contagious, and Kei felt his heart swell painfully.

“You’re a straightforward guy, but,” Kuroo smiled sheepishly, nervousness twinkling in his eyes, “I have no idea if it’s all in my head when I think that you don’t find me as disgusting as the rest of human population.”

That was a pretty accurate description, Kei thought as he took a strawberry from the bowl Kuroo had picked up from somewhere and filled up with strawberries since he knew Kei’s weaknesses, at least superficially. The taste of the berry spreading in his mouth made him close his eyes for the maximum enjoyment while he contemplated his response to Kuroo.

“It’s not all in your head,” he eventually said after Kuroo had started fidgeting. For all his confidence, Kuroo sure could be just as bad as the rest of the teens when it came to nerves. Kei looked away, licking the taste of the strawberry off his lips as his face heated up, reddening despite the shade of a tree. “You’re not Hinata. That already makes you a far more enjoyable presence.”

Kuroo’s laughter tickled at the air near Kei’s neck, but Kei didn’t turn to look at him yet. His face burned with some semblance of embarrassment, his long limbs itching to curl up and push Kuroo away. Emotions were such an unnecessary hassle.

“I’m asking what you think about _me_ , Tsukki. Without any analogues and comparisons to and with the shorty.”

“I have literally known you for six days.”

“See, we could have enacted Romeo and Juliet twice already.”

“People _died_ in Romeo and Juliet, Kuroo-san.”

“I’ll die of a broken heart at this rate,” Kuroo whined, and when Kei turned to look at him, the other was clutching at his chest as though something had pierced his heart, his facial expression overdramatic and faking heartbreak.

Kei snorted. He couldn’t help himself. Kuroo was— Kuroo was ridiculous, and it was good, it was _relieving,_ like he had pushed off the stagnancy in Kei’s life in one moment.

“You’re good at reading people,” Kei said, “so why don’t you tell _me_.”

Kuroo whined like a wounded animal, and Kei took pity on him, laughing as he leaned closer into Kuroo’s personal space. “Fine,” he murmured, heat coiling under his skin again. It had nothing to do with the temperature. “I think underneath your dorkiness, you are… a fairly… attractive person.” The words didn’t sit right on his lips, didn’t _taste_ right, and Kei frowned as he lowered his gaze.

Almost unknowingly, he ended up staring at Kuroo’s lips.

“Ugh,” Kei groaned, glared at those lips like they were at fault. And they were. “I don’t… I mean, I guess I like you in the way people like each other in those stupid romantic comedies that are only ever marketed to straight people, but you know. In a not-straight way in this case.” Kei’s face _boiled_ with heat, and he knew the words he just sputtered weren’t the ones he had wanted to say, but alas. Somehow Kuroo had made him tongue-tied. Go figure.

“So, like, a gay way?” Kuroo’s lips twitched, and well, Kei kinda wanted to shut him up by kissing him. _Resist, you fool,_ he thought to himself as he tightened his fingers around the fabric of his pants. “Or bi or pan or demi or—”

“I have no idea,” Kei said flatly, “I just know it’s different from the way I feel about my… friends.” He wrinkled his nose at the last word, as if uttering it was a crime bigger than a treason.

Kuroo’s smile was like the sun when Kei dared to take a glance at it — and more importantly, at his eyes. The melted gold of the irises shone bright enough to compete with the sun in the sky, with the golden field of countryside far from Tokyo, and Kei felt like his breath had been knocked out of his lungs.

Kuroo was breathtaking in the most literal sense possible, and Kei just wanted his oxygen back.

The question was to be expected, but when Kuroo asked gently “may I kiss you”, Kei’s face exploded with color in the most undignified manner possible, similar to the butterflies in the pit of his stomach. Those he blamed on the lack of a proper lunch.

“Fine,” he said back, like he didn’t want to, but in reality he did so, so much.

Kuroo pressed in quickly, not even a breath passed after Kei’s reply, warm lips against Kei’s colder ones, and Kei squeezed his eyes shut in surprise. For a first kiss, it was kind of awful: unplanned, made in the heat of the moment and in the heat of emotion, and completely sloppy as both of them obviously had no idea where to move and what the hell their hands were for.

So much for the legend of the Smooth Smoocher Kuroo Tetsurou, huh.

Kei smiled at the thought and into the kiss, feeling Kuroo’s mouth curve up in return.

When they separated, Kei couldn’t help making a comment, “I thought that out of all of the people from your school, it would be _you_ that has at least some kind of experience in this kind of thing.”

“We’re not all Da Vincis of kissing at birth,” Kuroo shrugged, his grin only growing wider as he pushed their foreheads together. Then, in a conspiring sort of tone, Kuroo whispered, “Wanna do it again, Tsukki?”

And like a starving boy, Kei said, “Yes.”

 

* * *

 

That was the beginning of it, some would say, but it wasn’t really. The beginning had been earlier, way earlier, in the small smiles Kuroo gave Kei and in the ways Kei didn’t try to push Kuroo away from him like he would with some others.

So, all this marked was the first realization that they were both in the black hole of attraction and wanting.

The dam had been broken, at least for Kuroo: he was always wanting some contact, even if just a brush of their fingers, and he looked like a fool when he stopped to stare at Kei as though he had been struck by a spell. _What a dork,_ Kei would think as he turned his own gaze away, face burning when Yamaguchi winked at him. _Good going, Tsukki,_ the wink seemed to say.

Saturday and Sunday went like that, them being absolutely wrapped around each other, though Kei was markedly less enthusiastic about letting his interest in Kuroo be shown publicly.

Well, Yamaguchi realized it even without any real hints whatsoever.

“So, is he a good kisser?” Yamaguchi asked him before they headed off to sleep, ignoring Hinata and Kageyama’s heated argument on the background. Something volleyball-related, Kei supposed and tuned them out. “I bet he’s a good kisser.”

“Not particularly,” Kei said, and he didn’t even choke on his words. Bravo, definitely deserves some applause. He didn’t look at Yamaguchi as he changed into his pajamas, mind full of Kuroo even without Yamaguchi bringing him up. “He claims not everyone is a Da Vinci of kissing at birth, so ‘practice ought to fix it’.”

“Well,” Yamaguchi snickered, “next week will be interesting for sure.”

“Not really.”

“It will! Didn’t you hear what the teachers decided? The last two days we’ll be at a beach!” Yamaguchi gushed, voice muffled by his shirt as he tried to tug it over his head but failing rather fantastically and ended up wobbling around, blinded by the fabric of the shirt.

“Really?” Kei cringed. As if the sun hadn’t been hard enough on him when they hadn’t been searching for it. “That’s going to be…”

“Fun!” Hinata interrupted from the couch. “We’ll get to play beach volley!”

“Gross,” Kei deadpanned as he finished up dressing himself for sleep, yawning as Hinata retorted something back. “I hope it’s not compulsory to go.”

“Tsukki, please.”

 

* * *

Making out in some secluded corner of the hotel seemed to become a habit repeated every few hours, spurred on by the summer heat and the fact that this wouldn’t last forever.

Neither really talked about the last point as much as the first.

“It’s so _hot_ ,” Kei complained for the umpteenth time as he carefully dipped his toes in the inside pool’s water. It was empty from people, for once, probably because most were busy touring around Tokyo trying to find souvenirs to take home with them. _Insanity_ was a word Kei used of it.

“You’re here, so,” Kuroo shrugged, though he too was sweating like a pig as he fanned himself with his hand. It didn’t help much, as Kuroo’s hair only stuck to the sides of his face more insistently as drops of sweat lingered.

“You’re the hot one,” Kei corrected, “I’m the slightly below average fifteen-year-old.” He didn’t turn to look at Kuroo’s reaction; it was obvious enough from the offended huff that came from his side and the tightening grip of Kuroo’s arm around Kei’s waist.

“Tsukki, have you _looked_ at yourself in the mirror lately?” Kuroo muttered, hot breath tiptoeing on Kei’s cheek like a whisper. “You’re gorgeous, and you have smarts. You’re the perfect package.”

Kei snorted.

Kuroo deflated. “Okay, no one’s _perfect,_ but you get it.”

“Kuroo-san,” Kei sighed, about to disagree, but that was the moment Kuroo decided he had had enough of the conversation.

And so he pushed both of them into the pool.

Yelling something like _Leeeeroyyyyy Jenkins_.

Kei had never screamed louder than he did right then, full of hate and chlorine water, and Kuroo laughed and kissed him.

Needless to say, later Kuroo sported an impressive bruise on his shin where Kei had kicked him once they had both gotten out of the pool, lips kiss-swollen and clothes heavy.

Trying to explain that to Yamaguchi and the rest (especially the third years, of whom Sugawara especially seemed to get a lot of enjoyment from watching Kei fumble with his words and knit his eyebrows in frustration) was embarrassing, mortifying even, since Hinata’s reaction was to laugh his ass off, and Kageyama wasn’t far behind with that smirk of his. Though he did say, sincerely even, “You could have borrowed my swimming trunks if you wanted to swim.” At that point Kei had retreated into their shared room without turning back to look at the others even once.

Kei ignored Kuroo the following day, which luckily was a busy one as they went back to the national park for a tour with an actual guide and didn’t return to the hotel before evening, by which time Kuroo and the rest of Nekoma had already had their dinner.

“Tsukki,” Yamaguchi began carefully over their meal, “you _do_ know we’re leaving after the beach days are over, right?”

“Mmhm,” Kei hummed as he scooped up food and quietly ate. “I’m perfectly aware.”

“You shouldn’t spend so much time being mad at him for something so silly,” Yamaguchi continued, staring Kei unflinchingly when he was met with a blank stare and a furrowed brow. “The week will end quicker than you think.”

“He pushed me in the _pool_.”

“You’re not sick, are you?”

“No, but—”

“Tsukki, c’mon. I’m going to talk to Hinata soon about you-know-what, so you might as well forgive Kuroo-san too.” Yamaguchi twiddled with his thumbs, anxiety burning on his face and voice, which perhaps was what persuaded Kei to do just as his friend has suggested.

“You drive a hard bargain, Yamaguchi,” he sighed, yearning for his music as Hinata and Yachi entered their own little gigglefest on the other side of the table. “Are you sure you want to do that? He’s, you know, _Hinata,_ ” he lowered his voice just enough for Hinata to hear on the off chance he would grow quiet.

“I think I have a chance,” Yamaguchi grinned uneasily, lips twitching as he tried to believe himself. Kei suppressed the urge to sigh. “Go big or go home, right? I mean, since you got yourself a summer romance, who says I can’t confess? I won’t lose to you, Tsukki.”

“Good luck, Yamaguchi,” Kei said sincerely, throwing one look towards the orange-haired object of Yamaguchi’s pathetically obvious affections.

 _He’s right, you know,_ he told himself, even if he didn’t want to acknowledge the truth. _It’s not like it wasn’t fun in a very childish sort of way, anyway._

 

* * *

 

He was going to have to say goodbye to Kuroo soon.

The looming thought pulled at his nerves and grated on them, but Kei knew he could not fight what was inevitable, so he should just go with the hedonistic approach for the time being: doing what felt good and what brought pleasure.

So when he saw Kuroo waiting for him at the hallway that led to both their rooms, Kei didn’t stop the embrace nor the following, nervous kisses on his face. It was Kuroo’s way of telling that he had worried — he also expressed that with words, as he was one to use them more freely out of the two of them.

(”Sorry, sorry, I went too far, didn’t I?” Awkward laughter bubbled out of Kuroo’s mouth as he scratched his neck. “It’s just what happens in movies, y’know? I have always wanted to kiss in pool.”

“There are other ways you could have gone about it,” Kei rolled his eyes as his hand found Kuroo’s. There was no one around, but the gesture made Kei’s skin burn. “It’s fine, you goof.”

“Yeah, but things usually work out spontaniously,” Kuroo pouted, and Kei leaned in to kiss him. _What a moron,_ he thought with something like reluctant fondness.)

It wasn’t going to last, he knew.

But that was okay.


	4. the map that leads to you

 “No,” he had said.

“Absolutely not,” he had added, when Hinata had pestered him to join them for a beach trip.

“Fine,” he said to Kuroo, who hadn’t even had to do anything but smile at him in that cat-like manner of his.

 _Weak,_ Kei thought in disgust as the group of students from both schools made their way to the beach, lively chatter accompanying them thanks to Hinata and Lev’s loud mouths. Even worse, in Kei’s opinion, was that the two loudmouths got along surprisingly well despite Lev being a Tall Person like Kei.

Well, that was until Lev pointed out both Hinata and Yaku’s height, which made both boys screech with an inhumane urge to _murder._

“Rest in pieces, Haiba Lev,” Kei whispered, and Kuroo laughed by his side so hard Kei was sure he was going to pull a muscle. “May your afterlife be as difficult as the life you led in this world.”

 

 

 

The sun, as expected, shone down on them, hot and merciless, and by the time they had set up umbrellas for shade and rolled towels open over sand so no one would complain about sand in places where the sun actually didn’t shine.

Kuroo, as everyone had come to expect, was all over Kei, nudging him and pointing to a shack nearby where they could change into swimming trunks, receiving very little reciprocation of desire to go fool around in the surprisingly clear waters.

Negotiations seemed to pay off, though, and eventually Kei was seen wandering off with Kuroo, hand-in-hand as they thought no one was looking at them. Yamaguchi smiled to himself. Tsukki really had it bad, much worse than he had admitted.

Already in his swimming gear, Yamaguchi turned to look at the rest of their group, eyes wandering immediately towards Hinata’s bright hair, which was like a beacon anywhere, anytime. Hinata’s laugh rang loud just as Yamaguchi found him, head tilted back as he laughed at whatever it was that Kenma had said.

Yamaguchi wasn’t jealous, not really. The feeling that wrenched his stomach was fear, not jealousy, though he knew they were eerily close to each other when relationships were concerned.

Kenma and Hinata had hit it off far better than Hinata and Yamaguchi had back when they first met, though partly it had to do with Tsukki and his leery challenges that Hinata leaped up for, agitated and provoked by the other first year.

 _Stupid,_ he told himself as he approached the two, a hesitant smile trembling on his lips, _it’s not like Hinata dislikes you. Or even Tsukki._

“Hey, Hinata,” he murmured, shyness prickling at his skin like pins and needles when Hinata looked up at him, blinking a few times before a fast smile rose on his face, pulling his eyes shut and showing his teeth and dips of his face as skin tightened from the force of that smile. Yamaguchi’s heart might have stopped for a moment or two.

“Mind if I join you?” The words stumbled out of Yamaguchi’s mouth, a slight stammer attached to each of them, and he felt both hot and cold all at once when Hinata stared at him in confusion.

“Of course you can, Yamaguchi,” Hinata said, patting at the space beside him. Kenma was on his other side, playing with what Yamaguchi thought was the newest 3DS. _I’m envious._ “Is something wrong? You look kind of pale.”

“Oh… it’s nothing,” Yamaguchi forced a smile as he settled himself beside Hinata, trying not to reach out for skin contact as Hinata started to ramble on how awesome the trip had been so far and what a grouch Tsukishima was, which got a laugh out of Yamaguchi and a soft snicker from Kenma.

 

* * *

 

“Kuroo-san, someone’s going to come look for us soon,” Kei grumbled, but he didn’t move away from Kuroo as the other’s mouth ran its own paths on Kei’s throat, over the pulse point and down to the dip of his collarbone. Kei tried not to groan at the sensation and the tingling that ran though him, but Kuroo was great at pulling reactions out of him.

“Mmm,” Kuroo hummed, not particularly interested in parting with Kei’s skin just yet as the corners of his teeth dragged slowly over a sensitive dip of skin, eliciting a shuddering sigh from Kei. Yet again.

Making out was fun as long as awkward boners didn’t come into play.

“ _Kuroo-san_ ,” Kei groaned, his fingers tight around the strands of hair on the back of Kuroo’s head before tugging hard, coaxing pained whimpers from Kuroo.

“Woah, didn’t think that would be my kink,” Kuroo sighed, leaning in to nuzzle Kei’s cheek. “You wanna go get some sun, then?”

 _No,_ Kei thought.

“Sure,” he said. “I’m just going to listen to some music while you guys go do whatever it is you guys do in the lake.”

“You should join us.”

“I prefer my music to water.”

Kuroo kissed the side of his jaw in an obvious plea. “May I join you, then, in your musical adventure?”

Kei pulled himself away from Kuroo, tugging his trunks higher before leaning down to blow air on Kuroo’s face. “If that’s what you want, I’m not going to stop you,” he said as he picked up his bag where he had shoved his clothes and the music player, now taking out the latter.

He pretended not to notice the brilliant smile that lit Kuroo’s face up. It was probably one of the more beautiful sight he had seen during his trip. (Because screw Tokyo Tower.)

Leaving the suspiciously empty shack and the changing rooms behind, Kei squinted as he stepped into the sunlight again. The volume of people around them, mostly from just the students as the beach was otherwise suspiciously empty, grew to the point where Kei decided it was better to just put the earphones on and ignore everything else.

(Not before taking notice of Yamaguchi and Hinata, though: they were both practically splayed over each other, hand-in-hand, and laughing to the point where all they could manage were wheezing breaths and hot tears rolling down their faces.

 _Good for you,_ Kei thought, unsure whether to be happy or not.)

 

 

* * *

 

 

Kuroo and he ended up under one of the umbrellas, one earphone on one of both their ears, and for a while it felt like they truly were alone with each other, sides touching and shoulders pressed against each other like it wasn’t too hot for skin contact.

“You have a pretty nice variety of music in there,” Kuroo commented, half-lidded eyes staring at Kei as they often were when they weren’t looking out for Kenma and the rest of his friends. “I thought kids were mostly into goth stuff these days.”

“You sound like an old man when you put it like that,” Kei snickered, lightly shoving Kuroo’s side for some distance. Obediently, Kuroo shifted until skin contact broke, and Kei could breathe again a little easier now that he had personal space again.

That was one of the better things about Kuroo Tetsurou. As much as he seemed to enjoy pushing buttons on occasion, he was perceptive of times when people needed space.

Kei could appreciate that, but the thought that soon there would be so much more space between them filled him with mild dread.

_Stop it._

“Hey, I’ll have you know that I’m,” Kuroo cleared his throat, “young and sweet, only seventeen—”

Why did those words sound familiar? Kei frowned. It sounded like an Internet meme.

“Dancing Queen,” Kuroo sing-songed to Kei’s earphoneless ear, “feel the beat from the tambourine—”

_Oh no._

“Stop that right now,” Kei said, but his words came out as an undignified wheeze than anything else. Even the intended tone of irritation fell flat as he fought hard with himself to not laugh at Kuroo’s off-tune singing.

“You can dance, you can jive,” Kuroo continued in broken English, grin wide on his face as Kei tried to find a way to breathe again, “having the time of your life~…”

“You shut up _right now,_ Kuroo-san—”

“See that girl,” Kuroo booped Kei’s nose, “watch that scene, diggin’ the Dancing Queen—”

“ _Kuroo-san_ , I’m going to sue you.”

“You like me too much,” Kuroo snickered, kissing Kei’s cheek before leaning back to his own space again, smiling as Kei’s playlist switched songs.

“You’re my downfall,” Kei mourned, lips forming a grim line that didn’t last long as a smile spread over them.

“And you’re my lil moonshine,” Kuroo murmured, even though they were about the same height with no discernible difference whatsoever. “Don’t forget that, Tsukki.”

 

* * *

 

 

“Just _what_ are you drawing on my back, Kuroo-san?”

Kuroo was startled by the indignant, yet somewhat tired, tone of Tsukki’s voice, but he gave no visible reaction when Tsukishima turned his head to look at him, eyes squinting as he had left his glasses by his bag when Kuroo had actually managed to coax him to swim.

Tsukki had already some red blotches, indicating sunburns, already, and Kuroo felt pretty bad for not noticing before. “I’m not drawing anything, Tsukki,” he said as reassuringly as possible (which was not reassuring at all, according to both Yaku and Kai, those assholes) as he spread more sunscreen on Tsukki’s skin, finger moving in a curving motion as he finished the outline of a cat’s face.

Yep, not drawing anything at all.

He was creating a _masterpiece._

“Yes, you _are_ ,” Kei disagreed, eyes distrusting, but who wouldn’t look distrusting when they had to squint?

 _I really like you,_ Kuroo thought to himself, a sigh stuck in his throat as he once more was struck by the beauty of the awkwardly long-limbed, sharp-tongued teenager before him. _Wish I could bring myself to ask for more than just these two weeks._

Was there a song meme that would work for a situation like this? Kuroo wasn’t sure, and that sent him into the deepest pit of despair a healthy seventeen-year-old from a good family could find himself in.

Kuroo also wished he had had the mind to not leave his phone with his clothes. He needed a photo of this, of the sunscreen cat resting between Tsukki’s reddened shoulder blades.

Too bad Kenma wasn’t anywhere near him, since they hadn’t bothered changing into swimming gear as there was no way they would swim or go anywhere near water. Instead they were chit-chatting with Shorty and Freckles-kun. Go figure.

Kuroo had to settle with trying to memorize the sight and the feeling of Tsukishima’s skin under his fingers while ignoring the dread of having to say goodbye soon.

 

* * *

 

The last memories of the trip, of the beach days, were of the beach volley matches that Kei had somehow been pulled into. He would like to say that it was because Kuroo looked very good while receiving the ball, but the truth was that Kei wasn’t as disgusted by the sport as he liked others to think he was.

And it looked like fun when the third years of Karasuno played it, anyway, as they didn’t take it so seriously. (Unlike Kageyama, whose eyes had regained their intense glimmer the moment a ball had been set in his sight.)

Kuroo, Kenma, and Lev formed a team against Kei, Hinata, and Kageyama — with Yamaguchi on reserve if Kageyama’s ankle decided to act up again.

The match was fun, as it wasn’t _too_ serious… but Kageyama and Hinata made it serious on their side, but Kei chose to ignore them and their “wow, you sure suck at receiving, Tsukishima” as much as he could. Stare-offs with Kuroo almost made up for it, as the gold-like eyes promised good things after the match.

What really made up for it was actually blocking Lev, and the consequently following astonished whine from the fellow first year.

It was all so very worth it.

Of course, Kuroo’s team won, what with Kenma’s on-point tosses and Kuroo and Lev’s spikes.

All the twelve matches, even. (Kei had never loathed Hinata more than he did by the time the twelfth match had ended.)

The kiss Kuroo stole from him, even though it happened in front of everyone, put him in a better mood, though there was a terrible emptiness drumming at the edges of his mind, saying _we’re leaving tomorrow morning, we’re leaving tomorrow morning._

Summer romances could only end in one way.

 

* * *

 

“Come see me before you guys leave, okay?” Kuroo made sure that evening, fidgeting at the door of Kei’s (and company’s) room. “I wanna send you guys off. Sawamura looks like he’s about had it with me, so I doubt he would do that even if I paid him.”

Kei remembered the long-suffering expressions that had crossed Daichi’s face whenever Kuroo came to his sight, and the memory made his lips curl up.

“I’ll try,” he said, but he knew he wouldn’t.

It was easier to break it off that way; it wasn’t like Kuroo had expressed any intention of keeping in touch afterwards either.

Kei had figured that would be the case, but he was a little attached to Kuroo’s company — and that was a lot coming from someone with trust issues and tendencies of keeping to himself.

Kuroo looked at him, inspected his face, and his lips parted, eyes gleaming with some degree of hesitance. As if he wanted to ask something. As if he was _dying_ to ask something.

Kei felt hope flicker in his chest, like the first cough of a cold.

“Good,” Kuroo said instead, licking at his lower lip, and Kei’s hope died like that, with a whimper in his throat that never made it out as he closed the door and bid Kuroo goodnight.

 

* * *

 

He had once asked why Nekoma even needed to go to a hotel, since they all lived in Tokyo already.

Kuroo had shrugged. “For the vine, I suppose.”

“What.”

“Just kidding.” Kuroo had looked wistful, running a hand through his hair. “It’s a last school year for us third years, so we decided to make the most of it and show the first years (and one second year) how to have a good time while behaving like civilized adults.”

“You’re seventeen.”

“Close enough,” Kuroo said as he stole a peck from Kei’s mouth. “I’m glad it led me to your way, moonshine.”

“I don’t have an endearing nickname for you,” Kei sighed, _not that it matters in a summer romance._

 

* * *

 

Staring at the back of the seat before him, Kei could taste the regret under his tongue.

He lied to himself by thinking it was the wasabi from previous night.

As the bus filled with rambunctious Karasuno students, Kei pulled his earphones out (nothing compared to his headphones, but they were sufficient enough) and planted them in his ears all the while ignoring the sickening displays of affection in the seats before him.

Supporting Yamaguchi all this time had been a mistake, since it ended up with Kei having to witness their disgusting cuteness.

 _Pathetic_ , Kei thought, but it wasn’t directed at Hinata or Yamaguchi.

 

 

 

 

What Kei didn’t know was that Yamaguchi had secretly given his phone number to Kuroo after Kei had dozed off, murmuring "please take care of him, Kuroo-san".

 

 

 

 

 

_You have 1 new message._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for taking the time to read this aaaaa
> 
> EDIT: NOTICED the illogical ending too late nnnnn


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